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rely on me.
i'm your soul.

Your photo here.

I'm a girl who ONLY love myself.
Oh yes, I love Zac Efron too, :D

strike out.

I want you
I wanna be rich too

hearts talking.

Cbox recomended, perhaps w counter.

alternative exits.

my mother
my sister
my friend
my puppy

my days, not yours.

March 2009
April 2009
May 2009

thank you.

Layout: Kary-yan/Missyan.
Hosts: x o x

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

I told another lie today
And i got through this day
No one saw through my games
I know the write words to say
Like "i don't feelwell,"
"i ate before i came"
Then someone tells me how good i look
And for a moment, for a moment i am happy
But when i'm alone, no one hears me cry
I need you to know
I'm not through the night
Somedays i'm still fighting towalk towards the light
I need you to know
That we'll be ok
Together we can make it through another day
I don't know the first time i felt unbeautiful
The day i chose not to eat
What i do know is how i've changed my life forever
I know i should know better
There are days when i'm ok
And for a moment, for a moment i find hope
But there are days when i'm not ok
And i need your help
So i'm letting go
I need you to know
I'm not through the night
Somedays i'm still fighting towalk towards the light
I need you to know
That we'll be ok
Together we can make it through another day
You should know you're not on your own
These secrets are walls that keep us alone
I don't know when but i know now
Together we'll make it through somehow(together we'll make it through somehow)
I need you to knowI'm not through the night
Somedays i'm still fighting towalk towards the light
I need you to know
That we'll be ok
Together we can make it through another day

......................................................................................................................................

im a fucking rockstar bitch!!
(:

.........................................................................................................................................................................

to-do-lists are always useful (:
i like to keep a list of stuff tht i've gotta do & all,its just so much easier eu noe??
gettting it all planned,written down & stuff ^^

sooooo heres my list:

piercings,hxc,bitch! ; nose
snakebites
monroe

andddd....i also wanna get inked (: but ill just start with my piercings first,once i've done them all,ill get inked!!

hmm..abt my list for piercings,its gng to be really hard to get them all at once,and my daddy doesnt approve of piercings so,lets just say its gng to be one steeeeeeeeeepppppppppppp at a time,huh?hahs..

.........................................................................................................................................................................

alright,so..

i didnt go to sch tdy!

yay for me!

butbutbut,

i still woke up early..

at 6.

i had to go for a,err..THING.

...............................

ohh yea,i swallowed my barbel!

like 3 times in a week??

*fucked up much?!*

so headed to central bought a barbel & then i went to the libraryyyyy!

whooo (:

whn i walked in everyone was staring at me,like seriously!

dont i luk like a person who likes to read books??

._. anywayyyyy..

im on medication..

its an anti-depressant.

hmmm...

whatever,change of topic.

.........................................................................................................................................................................

I look in the mirror,
scream at my reflection
why is this so hard
i just want to reach perfection
im trapped in a body which i dont think of as mine
but everyone else think im doing so fine
pretty eyed girl with smile so bright
but starving for thinness is what my mind says is right
When I look in the mirror ...
all I want to see is someone pretty looking back at me.
losing weight seems to be the only key,
then when I look in the mirror I'll see someone pretty looking at me.
Losing friends, driving them to their ends,
when I cry I just need a friend,
a friend who can hug me and give me a lending hand.
This is not worth it: to be in a dark tunnel and to just sit.
eating is not the end of the world, at least that is what I was told.
Sitting all alone, in my room being so cold, seems to be the only thing that would have sold.
I want to be happy ... that's all ... is it that hard?
do I have to wait for happiness to be sold??

*i do not own this poem.*
........................................................................................................................................................................

gosh,idk..

but,everyone keeps telling me im becoming hot tempered/short tempered.

i get annoyed at the littlest of things.

& i may cry at the slightest things tht make me unhappy.

or its like,

when im really sad,then i cant cry.

& without crying,how else am i to release all these feelings trapped in me?

and it hurts so much..

.......baby devil........







♥ 5:40 AM